He writes, "I recall how miserable I was, and how one day brought me to a realization of my miserable state" (Book 6, ch. Despite all his great accolades and social victories, he still felt an emptiness inside. Augustine states, "When my most searching scrutiny had drawn up all my vileness from the secret depths of my soul and heaped it in my heart's sight, a mighty storm arose in me, bringing a mighty rain of tears" (Book 8, ch. Seeking another pathĮventually, Augustine admits the force of God's love proved too much for him to ignore and he was overwhelmed by his conscience's awareness of the need for change. "I held my heart back from positively accepting anything, since I was afraid of another fall, and in this condition of suspense I was being all the more killed" (Book 6, ch. Still, Augustine laments, he felt dissatisfied with life. Yearning for greater things, he moved closer to Roman political life and was appointed the Royal Court teacher, perhaps one of the most sought out positions in the Roman Empire for its social advantages. As an adult, Augustine became a professor of Rhetoric and Philosophy and rose to the top of Roman academic circles despite being disappointed with the prosaic Roman school system that he found to be predictable and vacuous.
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